Hood Gay

 Not used to this person I’ve become.

Still stuck on the past like a drug

Society still labels me a thug.

The outcast not the plug.

Sex prevents me from falling in love.

That app is like a drug.

They call me a hood gay.

The gay that doesn't play the lost boy who can’t seem to find his way.

Struggle inside and numb the pain away.

At one point I couldn’t even accept myself as gay.

Slowly held a grudge

 held onto pain instead of love. 

The days seemed to blend together.

Lost hope even though I thought I could storm any weather 

to me it’s whatever.

A little hood gay trying to make it out the hood.

I try hard wish I could just move past the fact that society deemed me less than a man 

I still can’t figure out who I am.

I’m not just the little hood gay. I’m more than grinder and poppers on a Tuesday.

Ego don’t bruise me 

Sometimes I feel like I’m always losing. 

Just being myself. 

Mind filled with insecurities and doubts 

can’t seem to figure this gay shit out.

But each day it’s worth it. 

We all deserve this.

This love shit. This dream shit this nice scenery shit 

preserve even when we aren’t seen 

Shit it’s kinda  crazy.

We still embrace ourselves daily even when society drives us crazy. 

My people are amazing.

I’m not just the hood gay. The Homeboy buffet. You probably couldn’t understand the pain. The beast inside I tame.

Colorful and full of life fuck acting rite.

Sip one for the homies that couldn’t make it tonight let’s inspire others by continuing to live our lives.