Pride

 I remember a day not long ago. Peaceful protest as I hid the dolls I played with under my toy chest. Pride to me is another word for accept. Accept circumstances accept the fact that we are people too. See my past life was a nightmare waking up in cold sweats always fearing whats next. See I could not accept who I was I had no pride it what was. Resorted to gang banging and drugs. Ever day seemed to be a fasaud. See people like us have to fight for what we beleive in constantly discinated against for being us. See my expiration date was 18 could see past that please dont judge me this is a journey where I had to find humility. See my people constantly find the dream even in the darkness pride is more than acceptance its life and its lessons its what you been blessed with. Glitter covered chest fits are the best fits. Step into success and own you because you are the best Pride is the fact that we are happy to be alive to be ourselves to not fear what others think. So go and wear your crop top please be whoever you were ment to be because me im tired of being what society wants its top to top this shit off and pop off show the world what we are all about without a doubt we are kings and queens and everything in between.
Part 2
Another nightmare.
Wake up screaming in cold sweats.
I used to think a jail cell would be my best. Now I wear my rainbow colored vest.
See the life I lived was not really living.
I was giving into how other people thought I should be living. Bible giving. God please forgive me for my sinning when im myself I feel like I'm winning. They told me to never give in. Hot jails got me sweating is this really living.  I am tired of giving into the harsh realities my people face daily. If I was a straight white man they would praise me daily. Now they call me crazy for something they do daily. I cant even hold my partners hand without them looking at me crazy. I guess this world really isn't rainbows and daisies. Ow wait. Wait maybe I'm looking at it all wrong. See I don't rap or sing songs but I know I'd be wrong not to tell you how amazing. This life is even with the crazy. See that crazy made me. No matter how much my community endures we still prevail stepping our way towards the rainbow even when we are in hell. I see the funniest stuff wear a trash bag call it high fashion and strut find happiness in things other people don't give a dam about. We created community even when our heads were filled with self doubt this is pride and I am proud to be a gay Latino man. 

On the Cusp

On the cusp of something new.
I've been staring in the mirror asking who's this foo.
Don't yet know   don't  have a clue.
It's been years in the making.
True.
Lots of pain, mistakes growth than change.
Sometimes felt like giving up but they can't tame the inner.beast that's inside eyeing me denying me any chance to be stagnant.
I'm rampant when it comes to growth.
I swear my hustle is no joke.
Just months ago I couldn't get the words out didn't know how to clear my throat.
I made a decision I was tired of being poked.
See fate is no joke.
I always said I'm living on borrowed time and that's a no go.
It has a deeper meaning though.
See when you live life as though your on death row you find gratitude in the shit people look over they just don't know.
It takes one day to change your fate one decision one take. So each decision I chose to change my fate. On the cusp of soemthing new I went from lack of self love to dam you really grew truth is yeah I must admit I never thought I'd be this person always talked my shit I was my biggest critic yet I kept moving forward and slowly that inner pain diminished I turned all my negatives into winning this next chapter is going to be one for the books all this happiness and success got me shook but I know what's next it's all worth it because me and my people are the ones that deserve this.

Just us for all

Justice for all. Hmm Justice for all means I will no longer have to see my people fall both from bullets, handcuffs and all. See ive live in poverty since I could remeber justice means to me that I am fed whenever not just in January or September. Justice means that my people don't need to hide behind created beings and people like me can just be me. I don't wana have to hide being a person I created to be seen. Can you see justice to me is something that goes deeper than the surface my people are hurting black and brown people just don't deserve this but we are in a system designed to work us and hurt us. Justice for all means that we can call that 911 number and not find ourselves under the knees of people who are suppose to make us feel safe and breath but I can't seem to see justice for me is not something I could clearly see. See clearly I was fed to beleive that justice is a system designed to oppress me so please bare with me im trying to find the thought the vision and what not that will help me see past the oppression. See justice to me is learning from my lessons not being thrown away counting blessings. We are all blessed with this life so why do we have to fight to be scene heard or rite. Denied a chance to comprehend this pain inside they call my people deprived yet we found gratitude in just living our lives. Justice for me is being able to say the things that are truly on our minds the confusion and the stuff that has me lost in my mind asking my community if they think this is wrong or rite. Justice is the ability to stick up for what's rite without having to fight.
Justice means community it means growth it means change. Stop believing it's just us and let's start seeking real Justice

Why Run?

For real… it seems like the world only cares after suffering happens, why not before…? I feel like everyone just wants to settle a score.
Not me I want more. I have sex they call me a whore. The whole time they are doing the same thing well im in pain laid out on the floor. See people always expect more. More from you then from themselves. I don't wana stay in poverty don't fill my head with doubts. I'm one of those people that appreciates the life you have now why would I wait till you die to say I love you out loud im young maybe naive but not dumb why would I run from happiness and love I feel as though I live in pain when there's happiness I run how fun. The same cycle the same excuse I've used the same poor me but what about poor you. I've acted a full thinking pain was cool but that's not me anymore im no longer that foo